Alternative title: The End of the Begining.
There is a principle that rings mostly true to both good shoes and good men: comfort is key.
This is not what I mean. I'm not talking about giving up stiletos and picking from your grandmother's closet. I'm talking about comfort with style...the kind of shoe that makes me feel like a girl...but the kind of girl that can climb mountains and walk 600 miles without a blister (or heel spurs or shin splints or the like)...
There are few places you can't go wearing this sandal. Maybe its not as fabulous as this...
or these Jeffery Campbell's (imagine them in black with a pair of black shorts and a rolled up white button up)
But seriously, can you do anything outdoors in those? No. You can't. You'll break your legs.
Like shoes, pretty men are tempting...pretty, of course, being a highly (
highly) subjective term. I mean, this is a pretty man to me...
and I don't mind him one bit....
But I digress. I was going to make a point. Here we go.
On paper, the idea of being comfortable with a guy sounds tops. And in relationships, don't get me wrong at all, it is absolutly KEY (thus, this epigram should be that in shoes and RELATIONSHIPS comfort is key).
But on first dates, it seems, comfort is the last thing one should encounter. Sure, by the third or fourth date, I want the circus going on in my brain to calm down, and the 1,700 tiny ballerinas in my stomach to stop dancing so persistantly. But on first dates, it seems, there should be butterflies or ballets of tiny little ballerinas going on in your stomach. And where the butterflies don't go, I don't suppose I should follow.
Maybe other girls know this. Maybe I am behind. But I thought that if you got it right on paper, then the spark would just be there. I thought that if he was handsome, and kind, and met your criteria, then things would be a go. But alas,as if I were wearing a damn dansko Sally (buy them for me!
click here, buy them, and put them away for a Happy Fall gift),I was entierly too comfortable, entierly too at ease.
(one should be feeling like this on a good first date....)
Its incredibly frustrating when one realizes that its the idea that you could make great buddies thats killing the whole "spark" thing. It seems like it should work, but sometimes it just doesn't.
I've been out with some really nice guys lately. Handsome guys. Funny guys. But no spark-inducing ones. It leaves a girl to think that maybe the problem is her own. And for this girl, I feel thats probably the honest truth (g-d knows I'm picky, and my heart is deadly stubborn).
And in response to that notion, I'm taking a break. I'm a busy girl, and a clumsy girl when it comes down to emotions. I am reckless and I can't abide the idea of anyone's heart-happiness being dependant on my own. This isn't to say I'm fickle. There is evidence much to the contrary. I just know that I don't like the idea of being tied to anyone else emotionally. Sure, everyone has their exceptions (...) and if love comes along, the whole world stops (this is scientifically true). But until he does, or until my heart has it's spark-o-meter back up and running, I'm getting out of the game.
(the above is a scienctifically proven spark-o-meter. really.)
Here is what I will be doing with my spare time (you know, all ten minutes of it):
and planing for this
And not worrying about this
(ahem...the heart, not jim dine's artwork).
And to those exceptions, well--- you'll let me know if you need me, right? Because somethings are set in spark-o-meter busting concrete (something about the radio signals, I do suppose), as much as maybe one would like to change that. Remember that, anyway.
